Sunday, May 6, 2012

Know "It" to Live "It"

Know what? The Word. The Word?  Yes, the Word of God. Okay, yes, this will be another post about spirituality.  I do not want to force anyone to hear it, but I have to say it, or write it in this case. This is much of my life now, and will be from now on. Not that I won’t have other things to say, but this has taken front and center for me.

Today is Sunday. Church service was wonderful as ever today! And, yes, when I came home, I napped, but only for three hours this time, not five, hurray! 

I have tried to live most of my life with "good conscience" decisions, but not necessarily spirituality. Since I have opened my heart to Jesus, so much has been brought into question. In the Christian faith, we are to live the Word of God, but I realized I didn’t know it. Yes I understand the basic principles and all the “biggies” but I had only read from the bible once, when I was a lost teen, and even then it was a short-lived practice.

The church I am currently attending, a non-denominational Christian church had given me a bible back when I first said I wanted to be saved. I am still very confused on terminology and what to say when, which is why I love this church, because that is okay, they encourage discussion. Like today, one question was asked from the speaker, that I must have misinterpreted, because mine was the only hand raised, at least within my vision. The old me wanted to shrink within myself, but the new me, just smiled, and the woman ministering had a smile too, I think she saw me, since I was the only one, in a church that holds at least hundreds, with their hand raised high slowly pulling it back down.

This got me to thinking, I have been meaning to pick up the bible and begin reading it, but I just hadn’t done it. I had put all my attention into trying to figure out what I was supposed to DO with this gift of life. Today, I realized that I really should know the word of God, to be able to live it.

So I randomly started todays reading with the book of Matthew. Why? Well, not completely arbitrary and maybe somewhat superstitious, which is not what spirituality is about, but yes okay, because that was the name I had chosen for my first son… but since I did not have a reason, I just liked the name. My son’s father, my first husband, and I agreed to name him after a relative I had not met, but that had been greatly admired.  He was so greatly admired that I believe he has 4 or 5 name sakes. Which was fine, as he is still my son, who I would love by any name. Then get this, yes, more coincidence or superstition; My only son-in-law is named Matthew.

Okay, away from the silliness.  So, I completed “reading That book”. I now know this "task" is not something that will ever be finished. Yes, I can finish reading the bible with time, but I will study it as long as I live. I have decided to just READ the bible for now, not that it is a minor task, but as compared to “studying” the bible. There are many sections, that with the change or difference in the use of language, or with just my mind not working at full capacity, that I will have to re-read, make notations, research etc, in order to have a greater understanding.

But, I also want to do… the clock is ticking… I understand mortality… which priorities… OKAY – MODERATION. Whew, see why I find it hard to get to sleep at times. My mind spins around non-stop. Now if only my body could have that energy, and yes, I do pray for that as well J Speaking of which, I should start letting my mind slow down for another night, which leads to my next and first day of the rest of my life! 

I know, sorry, I love some clichés!

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